Ahahaha
yesterday I knew you'd had a long day -that you had a bad day
so last night I text you, about a little bit of nothing; I try to make it sexy
and I'm just playing around, just seeing how you'd respond.
And that part was good, it was fantastic
how you hesitated at first,
".....are you serious?"
I said, of course I am.
"What would you say..."  you said, "what would you, do?"
mhm, and I knew I had the reigns here; I knew
I was one initiating the situation, I was the aggressor;
you know how much I like that.
I said "I'd kiss you, slow, at first, softly, then harder, and I'd push you down on the bed."
It's a good, simple beginning to this kind of thing..
I didn't know if you'd ever done this before, so I started slow,
let you get an idea of what to say, what you wanted to do.
I said,
"Your turn."
And
you
said...
Oh my God.
You are
so
terrible
at
dirty talk
it shouldn't even be funny.

If I didn't love you so much, 
it wouldn't be funny. But I do, and it's fucking hilarious.
Because even though you're terrible at one of my simplest, softcore, most favorite kinks, 
I forgive you for being so goddamn adorable.

The first time I got to first base, it was like "Hmm, having someone else's tongue in your mouth is kind of weird."
That was accompanied by a mental *flail* and a little bit of a "wow this is, in fact, actually happening".

;P